They Aren't Here Anymore
by CriminalOutsider'sGirl14
Summary: The nights are the hardest part. It's the emptiness that eats at you, unable to forget who isn't there anymore. (Drabble). One-Shot.
1. Chapter 1

**They Aren't Here Anymore**

 **Summary : _The nights are the hardest part. It's the emptiness that eats at you, unable to forget who isn't there anymore. (Drabble)_**

 **Disclaimer: No, silly, I never have nor will** I **ever own The Outsiders. S.E. Hinton owns The Outsiders. *sighs* :( I simply borrow them for my own creative enjoyment purposes.**

 ** _Ponyboy_**

The nights are the hardest parts.

The emptiness of it all. The sound from the TV that was keeping you sane has already been shut off, signaling that even your oldest brother has finally went to bed, leaving you completely alone. Not even the trains are awake tonight, the last rumble from the nearby tracks was heard hours ago. Everyone's asleep.

Except for you.

Because you can't sleep. Not without knowing your parents are sleeping in their bedroom down the hall, peaceful and safe. Not without looking forward to waking up to your mother's cooking. Not without being able to wake up to your father's rough, worn hands poking at your sides to tickle you awake.

Everything's different now. And you can't handle it. You're falling apart, but no one notices. You're grades are slipping, and you still can't sleep, even after doing what the doctors said. You dread night time.

The days are hard. But nights are even harder.

Because during the day, you can forget. You can drown yourself in a book. Or with a pack of smokes, the nicotine making the pain much more bearable. But at night, there's nothing to distract you.

The memories are the hardest part.

It's like a weight on top of your chest that you can't get rid of. Remembering the way your father said he loved you, his voice husky with a hint of southern drawl that always came out when he talked. Remembering the way your mom would kiss her boys goodbye every time they walked out the door, no matter how old they were or how much they complained. Now, you would give anything to have her kiss you just one last time.

Then you get to thinking about what they'll never do. The memories they'll never get to make with you. Knowing that they'll never see you graduate high school. They'll never be there at your wedding, and they'll never be there to send you off to college, tears in your mother's warm, green eyes as she smiles her proud smile.

It's all been taken from you. It's why you can't sleep. It's also why when you do, you wake up screaming for them.

But they aren't there. Not anymore.

 **Stay Gold,**

 **~ Alee Xxx**


	2. Chapter 2

**They Aren't Here Anymore**

 **Summary: The nights are the hardest part. It's the emptiness that eats at you, unable to forget who isn't there anymore. (Drabble). Two-shot.**

 **Disclaimer: No, silly, I never have nor will I ever own The Outsiders. S.E. Hinton owns The Outsiders. *sighs* :( I simply borrow them for my own creative enjoyment purposes.**

 **Ponyboy**

Eventually, after a while, the dreaded night is over and your forced to get up and face the day that's come all too early, even though all you want to do is curl up back in bed and forget.

But you can't. So you drag yourself out of bed and force a smile on your pale face, despite the fact that your drowning inside.

Drowning in guilt. Drowning in pain. Drowning in memories and all the things you can't forget.

Your tired. But it isn't the kind of tired that sleep is going to fix. It's the kind that's all-consuming, that takes you over until you can't see a night of rest in sight. It blinds you and fills your chest with an empty weight that suffocates you.

You look at your brothers. They're okay, they're handling it. And you're left sitting there without an appetite wondering why you can't move on like they can.

You're broken, that's why. And nothing can put you back together again.

 **A/n: IMPORTANT:**

 **This is the last piece I will post on this site. I'm leaving so that I can focus more on school. It makes me super sad, because I love fanfiction, but I know it's time to leave. I need to use my free time for school and violin. I'm so sorry. :( You guys have been totally amazing, and I love you all. I'm seriously going to miss this website.**

 **P.S. Does anybody know how to stop alerts from sending to your email from fanfiction? Like review alerts?**

 **Stay Gold,**

 **~ Alee Xxx**


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